Real Estate Jokes

Congratulations on your new home:

A client bought a new home and the broker wanted to send flowers for the occasion.
They arrived at the home and the owner read the card; it said “Rest in Peace”. The owner was angry and called the florist to complain. After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist said. “Sir, I’m really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry you should imagine this: somewhere there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying, “Congratulations on your new home”.

Competition

A broker was dismayed when a brand new real estate office much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read ‘BEST AGENTS.’ He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading ‘LOWEST COMMISSIONS.’ The broker panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own real estate office. It read: ‘MAIN ENTRANCE’

C.A.R. REPORTS ENTRY-LEVEL HOUSING AFFORDABILITY AT 33 PERCENT

The percentage of households that could afford to buy an entry-level home in California stood at 33 percent in the fourth quarter of 2007, compared with 25 percent for the same period a year ago, according C.A.R.’s First-time buyer Housing Affordability Index (FTB-HAI) released Tuesday.

The FTB-HAI measures the percentage of households that can afford to purchase an entry-level home in California. C.A.R. also reports first-time buyer indexes for regions and select counties within the state. The Index is the most fundamental measure of housing well-being for first-time buyers in the state.

The minimum household income needed to purchase an entry-level home at $411,170 in California in the fourth quarter of 2007 was $82,200, based on an adjustable interest rate of 6.21 percent and assuming a 10 percent down payment. First-time buyers typically purchase a home equal to 85 percent of the prevailing median price. The monthly payment including taxes and insurance was $2,740 for the fourth quarter of 2007.

Source: C.A.R.